Alhamdulillah, Rasyue turned 2 last March. These 2 years have been such an amazing yet challenging journey for both of us. I believe that there’s no marriage couple in this world who does not face any difficulties along their marriage journey. I believe in order for us to be a happily ever after marriage couple, we must first be good to ourselves and our partner.
So, the other day I was scrolling youtube and suddenly came accross this video by Dahlia Syazwan. Yes, the Traveloka girl. She recently put on Hijab and made few vlogs of her spiritual journey. I came across this video entitled “Wanita yang akan ne neraka” by Dahlia and her husband. It was a good watch, a video that “flick” my heart I would say. Yes, I admit that I often watched those ceramah / talks by Ustaz related to marriage thingy, on how to be a good wife and such, but you know being a devoted and pleasant wife is quite hard these days (Oh, please tell me I’m not alone).
It seems like I really took things for granted which in fact I suppose to put my husband first in everything despite my own feeling. Whenever there’s any misunderstanding between us, I never tried to be in his shoes and always gonna blame him every time, which in fact its very wrong to do that. We, as a woman, sometimes expect too much from men and never accepting them for how they actually are. They are just human like us. We tend to forgot that they have feelings too. In my case, I kuat sangat merajuk jd laa emo and layan perasaan tu yang salah and I love making certain issue becomes bigger and bigger. -_-
So, after watching this video, I sat down and reflect myself for a while. Thinking on how many I sins I have committed towards my husband. My husband is someone who is very very very nice to me, to my family and to his parents as well. He is one of a kind. He rarely says NO to my request. Throughout these 3 years, I never once felt difficult or how should I explain this term… “POOR?” in terms of food, clothes, well-being and more. Ever since we got married, Rash never once forgot to buy our toiletries every month till we become Watson Elite card holder LOL. Not to mention the expensive groceries every week. Sometimes the takeouts and such.. Alhamdulillah ya Allah. Allah grants me such a nice husband, it just me whose being ungrateful all this time:(
“The best of you are those who are best to your woman”Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)
Importance of being a Good Wife
I was so demeaning and harsh to him sometimes. I didn’t take any chance to understand him. Absolutely not good listener for him. I didn’t comfort him whenever we fight. Never was a good wife. That’s it.
So, that video really has made me ponder upon and realise how being a righteous wife is really important in every marriage. How Siti Khadijah R.A really really respect and put Nabi Muhammad S.AW. first in everything. There’s this one saying “Redha Allah terletak pada Redha nya seorang Suami”. OMG, how BIG is that. Imagine performing solah, fasting, Tahajjud and even Taubat everyday, yet at the same time we are still being rude, disrespect and disobey our husband, are all those good deeds being accepted by our creator?
I always ask my husband to be like Nabi Muhammad, to follow his path and such in treating me but often I forgot I should be like Khadijah first in order for him to treat me like Nabi Muhammad treated Siti Khadijah. And often I forgot, he doesn’t do anything wrong in our marriage, it just me who’s behaving like princess. Meh
So, after watching the video, I tried to change my attitude and mindset towards him. I speak nicely to him and try to avoid any unnecessary fights everyday (It was so hard). Try to understand him more than before. Aim to be a good listener everyday. Try to put him first in everything and not listen to my own heart sometimes. Whenever we both encounter any issues (usually that will come from me), I will talk nicely to him and expect he will do the same thing too. I guess that’s how it works then. Alhamdulillah things are getting better these days and plus he likes me more when I’m not working I guess? Haha cause he gets to eat right away when he come back from work.
The Prophet (Pbuh) was asked “Which (type of) woman is the best?” He replied “When you look at her, you feel happiness.”
My dad often reminding me to always be thankful for having such great husband. He said if Allah grants you such good husband in your life, you should be thankful. You should make sujud syukur and such.. ok Abah….. Not everyone is happy with their spouses, and in case if you found one, be super thankful of it. To actually meeting a decent guy is very hard these days. Always pray that Allah will protect you guys till Jannah. That what my Abah would say every time.
My mama was such a devoted and beautiful wife to my Abah. Throughout her life, I can see how devoted she was, how kind and respectful she was towards my Abah. On the day she passes away, we weren’t be able to sleep that night, whole family were at surau that day. My Abah was praying the whole night. The next day, after everything has been settled on, my dad said this one sentence that I can never forget which was “Abah redha dengan mama”. Oh, to become a good wife is indeed not really hard when we understand our religion well. I aspire to become like my mama and my mother in law who’s indeed very devoted wife to my FIL. I hope one day, we manage to die peacefully with this kind of Redha from our husband.
To my husband, Happy 2nd and 4 months Anniversary, Love. This post is for you. Yes, the one in the draft for days, yes I know -_- I love you so much and couldn’t be more thankful. I am sorry for all these years. All those years that I treated you wrongly. I promise I will become a good wife and mother to our kids (In sha Allah). Thank you for always striving to become a good husband everyday and for always making my life happier each day. I am so grateful that you are always here besides me. I could not imagine my life without you. Let’s together we strive to better everyday, to be a happily ever after marriage couple like we always do. You are the greatest gift from Allah, love. Lets work hard to become a happily ever after marriage couple in this dunya and hereafter.